Surprisingly true college dating stereotypes
The 7 girls in art school
1. The vegan girl who cares about things like the enviroment and whales. Gets offended when you don’t recycle your plastic and still thinks unicorns are real.
2. The alcoholic fashion major, she knows she’s hot and spends her weekends cheating on you with older guys she meets in trendy bars.
3. The Intellectual, punk rock feminist girl. She looks like she hasn’t showered in a while, spends her free time convincing people to overthrow the government and works “manifest destiny” into every conversation.
4. The hipster girl, looked cute her first year of college then started wearing flats and leggings and got a fucked up haircut. Wears ridiculously large sunglasses all the time and won’t date guys who don’t have a beard and tight jeans.
5. The small town girl now living in the big city. Still dating her high school boyfriend because art school guys don’t play sports or have big muscles and popped collars.
6. The anime freak, loves all things japan. Spends all her time drawing video game characters and writing fanfiction. Even the geek guys think she’s geeky.
7. The great artist girl, thinks her art is cutting edge but really makes no sense. Claims people “just don’t get it yet”, only dates guys who get gallery shows at pretentious art houses.
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7 girls you will date and brake up with in college
The Jock
The Beginning:
Maybe you were good at sports, maybe you always sucked, but a semester of 4am burritos hasn’t helped either way. She’ll be cute, blonde, and look better in track shorts than she does make-up. Through careful deception, you’ll convince her you can still play intramural soccer sans heart attacks.
The End:
This, of course, is a lie, and you’ll both discover that, in the strictest animal-eating/shelf-building sense, she’s more of a man than you. You’ll have fun, but as soon as you try to keep up with her on the field (and elsewhere), she’ll be forever left with an image of you, wheezing, doughy, and begging her to slow down.
Party Girl
The Beginnng:
Scene: An awful club with a one-word name like “Velour” or “Prolapse”. You hate places like this. She’s skinny, tanned, and seems to be wearing a confusing handkerchief. She starts talking to you. You love places like this. Your friend’s a promoter or a DJ, whichever is cooler? She offers pills, and you desperately wonder if there’s a non-alphabetical difference between “E” and “X”.
The End:
A few months later, you’ll be broke, exhausted, and starting to resemble Christian Bale from “The Machinist”. She’ll pout, amused by your misery, and you’ll suddenly identify strongly with those sleepy YouTube puppies. Before even remembering if the sex was good, you’ll be dreaming of a world where naps are worth more than gold. Also, dinosaurs with lightsabers.
Church Girl
The Beginning:
After years of being told you’re a “nice guy”, you’ll finally meet a girl who makes you feel like James Dean, if James Dean had Wolverine claws and once drank eleven Bud Lites in a single night. To her puritanical sensibilities, you’ll be a badass, and you’ll fucking love it.
The End:
Option A, she’s the real deal and will try to change you. There may be a girl worth waking up at 8am on a Sunday morning for, but you’ll quickly decide she ain’t it. Option B, under the thin veneer of virtue there’s a boatload of real crazy, and she’ll quickly realize your Level 60 Badass is as lame as the World of Warcraft reference I just made.
The Dumb Hot One
The Beginning:
Not beautiful, not cute, just “hot”. Whether it was Daddy, society, or the media who ruined her, she’s spent years fighting her natural looks to end up in a place that should, by definition, be attractive, but feels distractingly photoshopped. She finds you interesting, and, in a moment of weakness, you’re going to go for it.
The End:
You two will last exactly as long as your tolerance for crippling insecurities and songs by former Mousketeers. As insufferable as you find her, she’ll find you distant, inconsistent, and generally a jerk. You’ll still keep a picture of her to show off. She won’t.
The Safe Girl
The Beginning:
Between the tough internship and the actually interesting classes, you’ll decide that a girlfriend should be like your old Ford Taurus: not flashy, but reliable, low maintenance and often mistaken for an undercover cop car. One day after Lit class, you’ll ask her out and, when she says yes, you’ll pretend to be excited, just like you did when you were sixteen.
The End:
There will be movies, dinner, and perfunctory but satisfying sex. It will be, by all technical definitions, “a relationship”. Then, as your schedule clears, you’ll realize you want something more, and that you just spent the last four months with someone “just good enough”. As did she.
The Friend
The Beginning:
You’ve spent hours discussing weed, hoodies, and children’s television from the 80s. She was there when you thought you could play guitar; you were there when she had that tat of Jem & the Holograms removed from her inner thigh. In fact, you’re completely comfortable with each other - did you just discover the magic warp pipe to dating without fear or anxiety?
The End:
Well, yes, but without fear and anxiety, without the unknown, dating is about as titillating as a five-year-old Slanket. And nobody only a certain percentage of people (whose websites I find personally very confusing) wants to fuck a Slanket.
The Perfect One
The Beginning:
Beautiful, funny, kind, she’ll inspire you to acts of poetry that will inspire your friends to call you gay. You’ll say it’s “love”, defined here as a one-sided activity comprised mostly of staring at her Facebook. After ten months of carefully planned, slightly pathological courtship, she’ll take a chance on you. And it will be everything you hoped for.
The End:
Aesop had a fable about a squirrel so scared of someone stealing his nuts that he lost them. Actually, it might have been a lion. Or maybe it was a Michael Crichton novel. Regardless, you will always be afraid of screwing things up with her. And (irony alert) this is what will screw things up. You’ll realize you’re in a relationship in which you can never truly be comfortable, and, five sweaty weeks later, just as graduation rolls around, you’ll realize she’s moved on. Your turn.
What Modern Men Want in Women
What do men want in a woman? Brains? Beauty? Vacuuming prowess?
Researchers at the University of Iowa find that men increasingly are interested in intelligent, educated women who are financially stable — and chastity isn’t an issue.
The findings are part of a study, conducted every decade since 1939, which asks participants to rank a list of 18 characteristics they would want in a partner on a scale ranging from “irrelevant” to “essential.” Included are such items as “sociability” and “good cook, housekeeper,” as well as “mutual attraction and love,” which came in first place for both men and women in 2008. (In 1939, it wasn’t in the top three for either sex.)
Male and female participants in 2008 rounded out their top traits with “dependable character” and “emotional stability, maturity.” Men ranked intelligence fourth, a big jump from 11th place in 1939; in addition, “good financial prospect” moved to 12th place in 2008, a shift from its low 17th-place ranking in 1939 and last-place ranking in 1967.
“This is a generation of men who has grown up with educated women as their mothers, teachers, doctors, and role models,” said Christine Whelan, head of the study and author of “Marry Smart: The Intelligent Woman’s Guide to True Love” (Simon & Schuster, 2008). “And in tough economic times, sharing the financial burden with a spouse takes the burden off these guys to be the sole provider.”
The study’s participants were college students from the University of Iowa, the University of Washington, the University of Virginia, and Penn State University.
“Like attracts like, so certainly the fact that we were polling college students would suggest that intelligence and education are going to be important characteristics,” Whelan says.
Another notable shift involves the significance of chastity: In 1939, it was valued more than intelligence in women, but in 2008, it was ranked the least important characteristic. Furthermore, it also was ranked the least important for men. This, coupled with the shared top-three ranking for both men and women, suggests a commonality that seems positively modern-day.
Details of the study are below.
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Details:
WHAT MEN WANT
Essential characteristics:
* Mutual attraction and love
* Dependable character
* Emotional stability
Important characteristics:
* Education and intelligence
* Good looks
* Ambition
Desirable characteristics:
* Good financial prospect
* Good cook and housekeeper
Unimportant characteristics:
* Similar political background
* Chastity
WHAT WOMEN WANT
Essential characteristics:
* Mutual attraction and love
* Dependable character
* Emotional stability
Important characteristics:
* Education and intelligence
* Desire for home and children
* Ambition
Desirable characteristics
* Good looks
* Refinement
Unimportant characteristics:
* Similar political background
* Chastity
Proven Women like manly men
Hormonal women are more responsive to manly men, and Kinsey Institute researchers have the brain scans to prove it.
Women participating in the Kinsey study were shown 224 photos of men’s faces, some of which had been “masculinized” or “feminized” using photo-morphing software. MRI scans revealed higher levels of brain response to the masculinized photos, particularly in women who were in the phase of their menstrual cycle immediately preceding ovulation and higher fertility.
The study, published this month in the journal Evolution and Human Behavior, is the first to show differences in neural activation to masculinized and feminized faces. One of the areas of the brain most activated by the images, the anterior cingulated cortex, is involved in decision-making and assessment, which indicates that women are calculating the risks and rewards related to a man with high levels of testosterone.
“Because male traits generally thought to predict good condition and even genetic quality often coincide with less desirable characteristics, women must balance potentially disparate mating priorities,” writes Heather Rupp, who headed up the study. “For example, although men characterized by more masculine testosterone-linked traits may be socially dominant and physically healthy, they are also less likely to invest in offspring and to enter into a partnered relationship.”
In the battle of nurture vs. nature, however, ovulating women ultimately will choose in favor of genetically strong children. At other points in the menstrual cycle, the feminized faces are preferred, indicating a dip in certain hormones and a preference for men who are willing to stick around and play catch with Junior.
“As is true for most social behaviors, both biology and social influences impact the output of behavior, and likely interact,” Rupp told LiveScience.
In addition, Rupp and her colleagues asked the women — none of whom were on hormonal contraceptives — to subjectively rate the images, and discovered that scan results didn’t always match up with stated preference.
The finding is a nod to the complexity of sex, and the phenomenon of making up your mind without using your brain.
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